Tribute to Ed

Edward passed away during 2020, and I’ve been intending to sculpt this tribute to him ever since.  The design underwent many changes, and several failed attempts.  It was frustrating, but after struggling off and on for the past 2 years… it all came together rather quickly in the end, and out of scraps of nothingness at that.  I felt that I had to do this as part of the grieving process.  I’ve lost friends and family before, but nothing quite hit me like losing this animal who was dedicated to me from morning till night.

I was very hung up on the design.  Initially I was going to make it as realistic as possible,  but I came to realize that Ed was an outsized individual.  He deserves an over the top larger than life sculpture.  He used to loom over me atop furniture, and peer down on me as I’d sleep like a feline gargoyle.  With that in mind I went with a very exaggerated Tim Burton aesthetic instead.  Like an elongated cat version of the Oscar.

I am not a religious person in the least but, I’m bringing this to Burning Man with me so that I can place it in the Temple.  The Temple is a non denominal place of spirituality where people place shrines and messages to lost loved ones.  Then on the last evening of the event, it is cathartically burned down to the ground along with everything inside.  

So why slave over a piece of art for months only to have it destroyed so spectacularly?  As a child did you ever make a sandcastle on the beach, and then pull a Godzilla by smashing the hell out of it?  That’s the feeling.  Again, I am not religious in the least, but after everything over the past few years this just feels like something I need to do right now.

With that in mind.  I wanted to make the project as non-toxic and combustible as possible.  Which is why I used scraps of cardboard, wire, foil, and newspaper for the armature (skeleton).  The clay itself is made from wood pulp (think an Italian version of paper mache).  It’s harder to work with than polymer clay, but non toxic when exposed to heat.  It feels like earthen clay, but doesn’t chip/crack as much in my experience while air drying.  It looks like stone when dried completely, but I also coated everything in industrial strength wood glue several times to serve as an exoskeleton.  I've worked with many different clays before, but this is my new favorite.

Fixed within the armature are some of Ed’s bandages from his cancer treatments.  Mixed within the paper clay itself is a small bit of his fur.  I know that’s weird and kinda gross, but this is obviously a very personal project.  Also, fuck cancer.

For lack of color there’s so much complexity that goes into a Siamese coat’s monochrome.  I worried over the amount of paint, the shade, and how to properly capture a creature that is essentially partially albino.  Ed was described as an “apple headed seal point Siamese” in terms of cat.  So I blocked out the basic colors and then used a series of washes to blend them.  Washes means I thin the paint, apply it, and then wipe it off.  Blend. Rinse.  Repeat.

I didn’t dare attempt to paint his eyes.  There’s just no way I could capture, and reproduce them on such a scale and be happy with it. Instead I painted a blue sparkly placard with his name to accompany the statue.

Eventually I’ll make another more modest sculpture in his remembrance to keep at home.  I’ll worry over that one at a later date.

Waxing and Waning

Title: Waxing and Waning

Form: Triptych

Medium: Acrylic on canvas

Background: Since most of my work is digital these days it’s been a couple years since I put actual paint to actual canvas. As I was decorating my new apartment I wanted to hang something new, but couldn’t find much I really liked. Finally I just said !@#$ it, and decided to paint something myself.

Influence: I am absolutely horrible at watercolor painting. That doesn’t mean I can’t fake it though, and mimic some of the natural blends that comes with the medium using acrylics instead. My apartment is lined with several works by Lora Zombie a Russian born blue haired muse whose works tend to drip and bleed all over the place like a colorful hemorrhaging heart.

Methods: I blocked out all the forms in Photoshop and drafted how the colors would transition.

Once I was generally happy with each design I projected the Photoshop image onto each canvas, and lightly traced each form in pencil. This saved me some time/effort rather than recreating the shapes again freehand. It also let me make maximum use of the canvas because I could control how each form would scale and appear depending upon how I moved and resized the projection.

After that I gave the forms a more definitive outline by sketching them with acrylic pens. With the sketches in place I then apply paint mostly working with the darker colors first. Before the paint can dry completely I hit it with a spray bottle and basically just let it drip and splatter all over the place. Even if you overdo it I can go back and fill in more color. Once I’m happy with the color I use a hair drier to accelerate the drying process before adding another layer/color.
The acrylic pen sketches underneath are set, and don’t bleed so the subject never loses it’s shape and I didn’t use them in the hair for the most part because I wanted to keep it as unwieldy as possible.

This is definitely one of the most organic methods of painting I’ve done before because I have no idea how things are going to play out with the unpredictability this much water brings. Regardless I felt I had more control over the direction of the paint with acrylic than I would have with watercolors.

I finished it with several coats of high gloss varnish to make the colors retain their pop.

Subject: I wanted to paint vague feminine forms across 3 panels, and not reinvent the wheel. So this particular piece of neopaganism lends itself pretty damn well to the segmented triptych form. So each goddess gets their own panel.

References:
Contemporary Paganism: The Maiden, The Mother, The Crone
Greek: Artemis, Selene, Hecate
Thomas De Quincey: Mater Lachrymarum (Our Lady of Tears), Mater Suspiriorum (Our Lady of Sighs), Mater Tenebrarum (Our Lady of Darkness)